Saturday, July 23, 2011

Tattooing for Dummies

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Tattooing for the drop dead gorgeous: Because scars are beautiful. And they may be the only thing making you real (a.k.a. distinction from Barbie). 

Tattooing for the geek: Because it's your only redemption - your ticket to coolville. 

Tattooing for the slacker: Just get your notes tattooed onto yourself. (Refer to Michael Scofield's antics.) It is the easiest way to copy on a test. 

Tattooing for the girl who's gonna get dumped: Because it's one way to ensure that your soon to be ex is always a part of you. This is way creepier than just wearing a vial of his blood as a pendant, and if your intention is to piss him off, it could work..

Tattooing for the rebel: Because that's the done thing and you can't possibly be rebelling against that, right? Because a rebel with a tattoo is so not a cliche!

Tattooing for the creative: Because the body can be your canvas. And because each scar tells a story.

Tattooing for the newly wed: Because you can take off wedding rings when you wanna be an infidel but a tattoo is never going off. This must be made mandatory by the government before weddings along with pre-nuptial agreements and HIV tests. In any case, a wedding is a formal agreement in front of witnesses bound by law. Might as well do the whole shebang and be in it for the long haul!

Tattooing for the thrill seeker: Because the pain from all the needles going against your skin, sewing machine style, may give you a huge adrenaline high.

Tattooing for the preacher: Because you want people to see that you practice what you preach. If you believe in the power of tattoos, get a tattoo. It's way easier than living a sinless life. (I know. They should make me queen of the world.)

Tattooing for the suicidal: Instead of cutting yourself with a  blade when you're feeling desperate, why not make a day out of it and think of ink? The pain can be as high as you need purging for, and you will have artwork on yourself to show in return. And better yet, no one will throw you into the mental hospital.

Now I have 2 tattoos - one on my left ankle and one on my right ankle. One says 'divine'** and the other says gibberish. 

Left - Divine + Right - Gibberish = Me
Other than the obvious reason that it is a tribute to my burgeoning creativity in deciding on things that define me (yes, I am being sarcastic!), I got it done for 6 other reasons among the above - no need to identify which.

* I am neither condoning suicidal intent nor am I intending to introduce inappropriate frivolousness into this grave matter. All I am saying is this - Don't ever try to hurt yourself. But if you must, go get a tattoo and move the heck on.

** No, I did not write divine on my foot just to be cheeky / audacious / rebellious / sacrilegious. I just like my ankles, possibly to an inordinate extent. If my body is a temple before God, my ankles are the altar. 

8 comments:

  1. doesnt it hurt? And why isnt Thom's name there ?

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  2. Tattooing for the thrill seeker - Maybe that's what I did. Though I hate pain. And I have the lowest pain tolerance! I'm waiting for Thom I'll reciprocate. ;)

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  3. ahem! what's that gibberish you said...

    ...and I promise I will get one for you..I wonder where I would fall in that list?

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  4. "Tattooing for the newly wed: Because you can take off wedding rings when you wanna be an infidel but a tattoo is never going off!!!!"

    But Obviously!

    The gibberish says nothing in hebrew.

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  5. Wish I liked my ankles that much. They're too much of cankles for me to draw attention to them on purpose.

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  6. See, I'm drawing attention away from other parts too! It's complicated, huh!

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  7. This is such a cool post!!! Very interesting! I don't have any tattoos but I can definitely see why people get them - these are all good reasons!

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